吉檀迦利(Gitanjali)

作者:顾惜之
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    第21~30首


      21
      I must launch out my boat. The languid hours pass by on the shore---Alas for me!
      The spring has done its flowering and taken leave. And now with the burden of faded futile flowers I wait and linger.
      The waves have become clamorous, and upon the bank in the shady lane the yellow leaves flutter and fall.
      What emptiness do you gaze upon! Do you not feel a thrill passing through the air with the notes of the far-away song floating from the other shore?
      我必须划出我的船去。怠惰的时光都耗在岸上了——我真真可叹!
      春日开过花就离去。如今我却背负着无用的落英,等待又流连。
      涛声渐喧,岸上的林荫道黄叶纷飞飘落。
      你凝望着何等的空虚!你不觉得有一阵激动随着对岸遥远的歌声自空飘来?

      22
      In the deep shadows of the rainy July, with secret steps, thou walkest, silent as night, eluding all watchers.
      Today the morning has closed its eyes, heedless of the insistent calls of the loud east wind, and a thick veil has been drawn over the ever-wakeful blue sky.
      The woodlands have hushed their songs, and doors are all shut at every house. Thou art the solitary wayfarer in this deserted street. Oh my only friend, my best beloved, the gates are open in my house---do not pass by like a dream.
      在多雨七月的浓阴里,你秘密行步,轻悄如夜,躲过所有人的目光。
      今天,清晨闭上眼,不理会呼啸东风的连连呼喊,一张厚厚的纱幕拉上,遮住了永远清醒的碧天。
      林野住了歌声,家家闭户。你是孤独的旅人行在这荒寂的街上。噢,我唯一的朋友,我的最爱,我的家门敞开着,不要梦一般地走过吧。

      23
      Art thou abroad on this stormy night on thy journey of love, my friend? The sky groans like one in despair.
      I have no sleep tonight. Ever and again I open my door and look out on the darkness, my friend!
      I can see nothing before me. I wonder where lies thy path!
      By what dim shore of the ink-black river, by what far edge of the frowning forest, through what mazy depth of gloom art thou threading thy course to come to me, my friend?
      在这暴风雨之夜,你还在外面做爱的旅行吗,我的朋友?天空像绝望之人在哀嚎。
      我今夜无眠。我不断开门望向黑暗中,我的朋友!
      我看不见眼前的一切。我不知你的行踪在哪!
      你是经过墨黑河流的阴晦滩涂,经过颦眉森林的遥远边际,穿过令人迷惑的深浓昏暗,来到我这儿的吗,我的朋友?

      24
      If the day is done, if birds sing no more, if the wind has flagged tired, then draw the veil of darkness thick upon me, even as thou hast wrapt the earth with the coverlet of sleep and tenderly closed the petals of the drooping lotus at dusk.
      From the traveller, whose sack of provisions is empty before the voyage is ended, whose garment is torn and dustladen, whose strength is exhausted, remove shame and poverty, and renew his life like a flower under the cover of thy kindly night.
      若白昼已逝,若群鸟住了歌声,若风也吹倦了,那就用黑暗的纱幕厚厚地将我盖上,正如你在黄昏时用睡眠的被单裹上大地,轻柔地合上睡莲凋萎的花瓣。
      旅人行程未达,粮袋已空,衣裳污损,气力将竭,你卸去了他的羞愧和贫穷,让他的生命在仁慈的夜幕下如花般苏醒。

      25
      In the night of weariness let me give myself up to sleep without struggle, resting my trust upon thee.
      Let me not force my flagging spirit into a poor preparation for thy worship.
      It is thou who drawest the veil of night upon the tired eyes of the day to renew its sight in a fresher gladness of awakening.
      在这困倦之夜,让我顺服地把自己交给睡眠,把信赖交托给你。
      令我不用去勉强疲惫的精神,为你的礼拜敷衍准备。
      是你拉着夜幕盖上白日的倦眼,令它们在醒来时更清新的喜悦中,恢复光明。

      26
      He came and sat by my side but I woke not. What a cursed sleep it was, O miserable me!
      He came when the night was still; he had his harp in his hands, and my dreams became resonant with its melodies.
      Alas, why are my nights all thus lost? Ah, why do I ever miss his sight whose breath touches my sleep?
      他来了坐在我身畔,而我不曾醒来。可恨的睡眠,唉,可怜的我啊!
      他在静夜中来,手中拿竖琴,我的梦与它的旋律生了共鸣。
      唉,为何我的夜晚都这般虚度?啊,他的呼吸触及了我的睡眠,为何我却总见不到他面?

      27
      Light, oh where is the light? Kindle it with the burning fire of desire!
      There is the lamp but never a flicker of a flame---is such thy fate, my heart? Ah, death were better by far for thee!
      Misery knocks at thy door, and her message is that thy lord is wakeful, and he calls thee to the love-tryst through the darkness of night.
      The sky is overcast with clouds and the rain is ceaseless. I know not what this is that stirs in me---I know not its meaning.
      A moment's flash of lightning drags down a deeper gloom on my sight, and my heart gropes for the path to where the music of the night calls me.
      Light, oh where is the light! Kindle it with the burning fire of desire! It thunders and the wind rushes screaming through the void. The night is black as a black stone. Let not the hours pass by in the dark. Kindle the lamp of love with thy life.
      光,噢光在哪儿!用灼灼渴望之火将它点亮吧!
      这里有灯,却无一丝火焰——这就是你的命运吗,我的心?啊,你还不如死了好!
      悲哀敲响你的门,带来你的主醒着的消息,他唤你穿越夜的黑暗赴爱的幽会。
      阴云密布,落雨不停。我不知体内在动荡是什么——我不懂它的意义。
      一刹的电光,在我视野中抛下更深的黑暗,我的心探索着路途,去往夜之音乐呼唤我之处。
      光,噢光在哪儿!用灼灼渴望之火将它点亮吧!雷鸣,风尖啸着冲过虚空。夜如黑岩一般黑。莫教时光在黑暗中度过罢。用你的生命点亮爱之灯火。

      28
      Obstinate are the trammels, but my heart aches when I try to break them.
      Freedom is all I want, but to hope for it I feel ashamed.
      I am certain that priceless wealth is in thee, and that thou art my best friend, but I have not the heart to sweep away the tinsel that fills my room
      The shroud that covers me is a shroud of dust and death; I hate it,yet hug it in love.
      My debts are large, my failures great, my shame secret and heavy; yet when I come to ask for my good, I quake in fear lest my prayer be granted.
      束缚是坚韧的,但要破坏它时,我心又疼痛。
      我只想要自由,但又为盼望自由而羞愧。
      我确知那无价之宝在你处,而你是我最好的朋友,但我却没有勇气荡尽我那满屋的华而不实之物。
      包裹着我的是尘埃和死亡的尸衣;我恨它,却眷爱地抱紧了它。
      我欠下了巨债,我经了惨痛的失败,我背负了隐秘而深重的羞耻;但当我来求福之时,我又战栗,唯恐我的祈求得到应许。

      29
      He whom I enclose with my name is weeping in this dungeon. I am ever busy building this wall all around; and as this wall goes up into the sky day by day I lose sight of my true being in its dark shadow.
      I take pride in this great wall, and I plaster it with dust and sand lest a least hole should be left in this name; and for all the care I take I lose sight of my true being.
      那个被我用我的名字囚禁的人在这监牢中哭泣。我不停地忙着绕着围墙修筑它;当它一日日高入天际时,我看不见没在高墙阴影中的真我了。
      这道高墙我引以为荣,我用尘砂涂抹它,唯恐这名字上还漏下一个小洞;也因这全心倾注的关顾,我看不见我的真我了。

      30
      I came out alone on my way to my tryst. But who is this that follows me in the silent dark?
      I move aside to avoid his presence but I escape him not.
      He makes the dust rise from the earth with his swagger; he adds his loud voice to every word that I utter.
      He is my own little self, my lord, he knows no shame; but I am ashamed to come to thy door in his company.
      我独自去赴幽会。但,是谁在静寂的黑暗中跟着我?
      我走开躲他,却逃不掉。
      他昂首阔步,教土地扬尘;我说出的每个字眼,都掺杂着他的高声。
      他是我的小我,我的主人,他不知羞耻;但和他同到你门前时,我却感到羞愧。
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    译于08年末09年初

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